Adoption is affordable - Part 1

(This post has been weeks, maybe even months, in the making.  I have so much to say on this topic that it will be posted in installments.)

When we first adopted our youngest son, I was amazed at how many people mentioned their own desire to adopt.  Yet, without fail almost every person voiced the same concern.  "We really want to adopt, but it's just too expensive."  I want to dispel the myth that adoption has to be expensive.  Obviously, if we can do it - so can you!

Private infant adoption and international adoption can be costly.  We chose to adopt through the foster care system.  Staying local cuts obvious costs like flights and hotels, as well as other costs involved such as international fees and visas.  The main cost difference between private and foster care adoption is that the government pays most of the fees associated with adoption through foster care.

That doesn't mean it is free, but it is significantly less expensive.  All adoptions start with the same costs - a home study.  The home study will involve background checks, finger printing, home fire safety inspection, CPR/First Aid training, and possible other small costs.  There are many factors but you should estimate about $1,000 to cover all of the costs.  Once your home study is finished there are few if any costs involved in an adoption through foster care.

However, cost is only one of many considerations when adopting.  I think there is a stigma in adopting from foster care.  I have heard things such as: "Aren't they all special needs?"  "Don't they all have problems?"  "I heard you can only adopt teenagers."  I'm sure most people are well-meaning, but honestly my biological children have problems and one has a learning disability.  That doesn't mean anything to me.  A child in foster care has obviously had a disadvantage in life - they have experienced great loss at an early age.  This is true in every adoption story.

The subject of age is another matter.  It is true that adopting an infant from foster care is unlikely.  That is because the system of foster care is always hoping for reunification.  By the time it is obvious that reunification is impossible, most children are older.  There are times when parents willingly relinquish an infant, but more often than not legally free (adoptable) children are already over the age of 4.

My husband was so over diapers and potty training and  sleepless nights that a 4-year-old sounded just about right.  Our youngest was 8 at the time, so we wanted a child under 8.  No problem, within six weeks of finishing all of the paperwork we were told that a special little 5-year-old would be our son.  Every story and situation is different, but if you are not pursuing adoption because of the cost, be encouraged.  Adoption is affordable!!

Up-cycled table

I've been looking for a small table to put on our back porch.  I tried yard sales and Craigslist but nothing seemed right.  Finally, my husband went to the Restore and found something acceptable.  I say acceptable because it was plain and ordinary - nothing much to look at.  But it only cost $15, so we went with it.

Something had to be done to liven up the table.  Our kids like to play games on the porch, so why not a game table?  I measured out a checkerboard on the top and taped it off.  I considered a traditional red/black color scheme but we don't have any red paint.  I considered going with black and the natural table, but that seemed boring.  I had some blue paint (I have no idea where it came from!) so I decided on blue and the natural table.  After painting and removing the tape, I applied three coats of polyurethane.  Now the kids can play checkers, chess, or even just a game of cards.

Free stuff for the summer

I have four kids, so doing fun things can get really expensive.  Here are some of our favorite free (or super cheap) things to do in the summer.

$1 movies - Regal or Cinemark (or Carmike but this costs $4 and includes popcorn and a drink)
G and PG rated movies that are not new releases are shown on weekday mornings.
We have found that sometimes restaurants next to the theater will offer lunch specials on those days.

Free bowling - AMF or various others
Kids can bowl two free games every day.  The cost of shoe rental is not included and can vary from place to place, so call ahead to find the cheapest one near you.

Free skating - various
Unfortunately there is not one near me - but maybe you will be lucky!

Free museums
There are a lot of these near me and we frequent them year round.
Also, if you are a customer of Bank of America or Merrill Lynch you can participate in Museums on Us.

Of course don't forget parks - local, state, and national.  These can provide everything from swimming, hiking, and camping to educational and historical field trips for little to no cash.

Enjoy your summer!

"Renting" furniture?

I move - a lot.  This will be my ninth move in the past 17 years of being married.  One thing I've learned is not to get too attached to things.  The comfy sectional sofa that is perfect in one home, just doesn't fit in the next.  So out it goes.  This is one reason why I love Craigslist.  I can buy and sell until everything fits.

It occurred to me this week that in a sense we rent our furniture.  Well, we sometimes borrow furniture for free!  Here are two recent examples.  When we moved into our current home, I wanted a shelving system that would look built-in.  I found the perfect thing on Craigslist and paid $250 for it.  Three years later, I want to keep part of it but not the whole thing.  So, I sold part of it for $50.  I probably could have sold the whole thing for the same $250 I paid for it.  Around the same time, I bought a wardrobe for our bonus room that we use as a bedroom.  Our new home has tons of closets, so out it goes.  We paid $95 for it three years ago and this week we sold it for $115.  So, we made $20 for "renting" our wardrobe the past few years.

The wardrobe that made me money.

A few tips for shopping on Craigslist:

Do your homework and know what it would cost new.

Always offer less than the listed price.

Consider the resale value.  Think - "Can I sell it for the same amount later?"

Remember that classic pieces and colors sell faster.

Habitat for Humanity's ReStore

We recently sold our house and are fixing a few things for the buyer.  We had a few broken pieces of vinyl siding thanks to having kids (kids that like to practice baseball in the backyard).  Who knew it would be impossible to find matching siding for the repair!  My husband spoke to manufacturers, installers, warehouse stores, and more, only to find that it was not to be.  So, on a whim he went to Habitat for Humanity's ReStore.  There he found a similar enough piece for only $1.  He was able to take a piece off of an inconspicuous place to repair the bad spots.  Then he painted the ReStore piece to match the house and placed it on the now-empty inconspicuous place.  Viola!  The siding repair man said he would charge $100 just to come look at it; my husband repaired it for a total of $30 including the siding, paint, and tool.

Can you even tell this is not a exact match?

Well after that amazing find, I decided to go look around the ReStore for ideas for the new house.  What I found was a box of glass mosaic tiles to put a backsplash in my kitchen.  I had priced these before and knew that the mosaic tiles cost $9 for a 12x12 sheet.  The ReStore had a box of 20 sheets for $25.  That is a savings of $155.  It should be just enough for my new kitchen.


Habitat's ReStore is great place to find new and used items for your home.  From furniture and rugs to cabinets and flooring, it is full of great deals.

It pays to be patient

We are buying a new house.  House shopping can be fun.  It can also be frustrating.  This is supposed to be a buyer's market, so I anticipated getting a good deal.  However, a lot of people paid too much for their home and now they just won't be reasonable about the current value of their home. 

My plan was to look at a few homes and then buy one.  That was not how it worked out.  We saw so many homes that had major problems but were priced as if they were move-in ready.  We put in offers on several homes.  One was a foreclosure and, even though we put in the highest offer, we were beat out by a cash offer.  It just didn't seem to be coming together.

The last offer we put in on a house was also rejected and I was beginning to think I would have to pay more than I was willing to pay.  Our realtor told us to stick to our plan and I'm glad we did.  The owners called back a few days later and accepted our offer.  It really does pay to be patient.

It never hurts to ask

I got an amazing deal today.  All I had to do was ask.  Well, and be a little persistent.

I saw a chair (in a box, not assembled) that would go perfectly in my living room.  It had been ordered online and returned to the store.  Originally it was $140, but was marked down to $100 because they don't carry them in the store.  I was excited already.

I took it out of the box and noticed some damage.  It was on the back and I thought I could live with it - for the right price. 

I took it to the front and asked to speak to a manager.  I showed her the damage and asked if they could give an extra discount.  She said she couldn't.  Not that it couldn't be done, but that she couldn't.  So I asked to speak to a higher manager.  Another woman came out and quickly agreed to discount it further.  I was hoping for another $20 or $25 off.  Surprisingly, she marked it down to $50!!  What an awesome deal!  Plus, I got another 5% off with my Target card.  That's a total of $47.50 plus tax for my new chair.